AFL Trade Week (Non-) News From Thursday

Anyone bored yet?

Snoozefest 08 is almost coming to a close. Will tomorrow’s final day of trading make up for the most boring week of the year, or will we carry the sour taste of empty expectations through to Draft Day?

If you can keep your eyes open, let’s run through the developments of day 4, Thursday…

• Nothing! Nothing bloody happened! Is anything going to happen?

You’re still reading? I’m serious. Nothing happened. So let’s look at the real news from the day:

• Neil Balme set a new morning tea record, knocking off his previous best from Tuesday with an astonishing range of pastries and savouries,
• Mick McGuane managed to use the phrase of:
  

  Collingwood would not be inclined to take such a path as to go down that road to put themselves and their players in the nominated situation that is being presented to them for their due consideration and diligence which in turn will see the offer revoked and a new sense of trust instilled in their player base by way of their chosen actions and ability to handle both unforeseen and predicted affairs to the best of their ability

  to describe the Pies turning down pick 4 for Didak,

• Dean Laidley collected the coaches’ pool for nominating the biggest name up for trade and then being able to take the offer off the table with his shifty McIntosh maneuver. Paul Roos had the award wrapped up until Ryan O’Keefe took a liking to leaving the club, rendering Roos ineligible for the kitty and the Swans minus a forward,

And finally, the non-news from today:

• Hawks and Swans still nutting out a deal for O’Keefe
• Freo and whoever will listen still nutting out a deal for Warnock
• Brad Green throws up Collingwood as his next holiday destination after Tasmania, and
• Cousins may join up with his old mate Mick Gardiner at the Saints

So this time tomorrow, we will either be swearing off trade week for good, or again realising that nothing ever happens until Friday arvo and wondering why we even bother worrying about it before then.

Check back then!